Release.

Release: What unfinished projects from 2014 am you willing to release now? 
(Regret not required.)

Oh sweet release.
I am a project starter, an idea girl. Follow-through? Not my strong suit. Unless it's a project that I'm dedicated to, one that lives deep in my heart. I like the process, usually more than the end result, and will slowly (oh so slowly), work. Of course I do finish (some) things but I also, easily, give myself permission to let things go that don't tug at my heartstrings.

Over the past month or so I've been wound up tight, knowing that I have to exhale, release...something. Sweet release and surrender needs to happen in the people department. Projects? I can let those go, let those slide. People? No, never.

So, I decided to release....
*other people's happiness
*responsibility that is not my own
*worry, to the best of my ability
*fear that people are making a mistake
*anxiety over judgement
.........all of these things equal control and releasing control is the hardest thing for me to do. Ever. It is my goal. A goal that I will be working on forever. A goal that I will need to be reminded of often. A goal that I hope, with time and practice, will help me exhale.

You leave old habits behind by starting out with the thought, 'I release the need for this in my life'.

Wayne Dyer

Certainty...

 
Today, I invite you to take a quiet moment to consider: 
what can you say right now with certainty?

I grew up in a life, in a world, of uncertainty, so to answer the question of what I can say with certainty makes me laugh mostly since I never really considered it before. It seems, that at forty, I would have left my childhood behind me, at least enough to not have my brain immediately rush back to it when given a writing prompt...

So, what can I say, right now, with certainty?

Belief in magic and all possibilities

Wide open heart

Arms flung

Embracing

Encouraging

Encompassing

Loving

Dreaming the dreams

Living the life

Holding tight

Song in my heart

Smile on my lips

Absolute love

With certainty I am those words, I believe those words. 

For my part I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of the stars makes me dream.

Vincent Van Gogh

What I use to do...

I look at my blogs and I think about what I use to do. This blog itself hasn't really come to fruition within who I am. As in, I had a few blogs before and I was dedicated and they were dedicated. The personal one documented life on almost a daily basis; the book blog was amazing and it felt like either make it soar or let it go; and the photo blog ran its course and finished on an amazing note.

I miss writing. Just putting words out there and seeing what I come up with. So, I'm trying to figure out how to make this SHINE just like the address says.

As I read the last post I focused in on change. Maybe I needed a little time to change offline; this seems so as I have been offline much more in the past year than before. I was a facebook fiend once upon a time...it seems that when the fb got popular I took a back seat. Kinda an aha moment as that is what I do a lot in my life...

So, here's to what's next. Change and possibility.

...and some change

I was just looking at my calendar and there is just two weeks and some change until this little guy hits that big milestone.

Graduation.

Some mamas are feeling a bit sad and I suppose I can say the same, however mostly I'm excited. So excited. When the boy was in elementary school one kind teacher, who saw me struggling each day to leave this guy, kindly said to me, "We raise them to be awesome people and we raise them to leave us." I have carried these words around with me ever since. (By the way, I've done what she said...He is an awesome person. One of the most awesome people I know!)

I suppose I am lucky. My boy isn't "leaving" me. He'll be staying home, for awhile at least, attending the local community college and remaining a fixture in our home. So, yeah, it's easier than knowing he'd leave.

I am so excited though. For the next part of the journey. New chapters yet to be written. Not just for Archer but for all of us. So, when I was thinking "two weeks and some change," I really meant some change. I feel like maybe I should decide what I want to be when I grow up! Loving it! LET'S GO! 

everything. everyone.

make your own card

Today, right now, this quote spoke to me with such a feeling of "YES! True. True. True." That I had to keep it as a reminder to myself........
Everything matters. Everyone can teach me. Everyone is worth "it" (whatever "it" may be). Look through the lens of love and life is truth.
So far this has been a whirlwind year. Mostly an awesome whirlwind, however even all that good stuff can be exhausting. No complaints here just supreme gratitude that I can be exhausted with awesomeness.

Month in Numbers - April 2013

April was awesome. Crazy, busy, full. It seems like I barely had time to breathe but enjoyed every moment.

Here we go...Let's see if I can break it down in numbers.

On April 3 I tured a glorious 39 years old. I, for one, love my birthday and cherish every new year and love the numbers as they get bigger. Maybe this love of aging will end one day, but I hope not.

I spent my birthday with 2 amazing family members. 1 cousin, 1 brother (and I met 1 "new" nephew). Gotta love a day like that.

1 birthday dinner made by my most amazing husband. 1 birthday lunch with a wonderful friend.

On April 6 my boy came home from 14 days away (in Palau with his grandparents). I hugged him at least 20 50 times.

The boy decided to go to prom. Tux = $119; dinner = $50; a stuffed owl for his date (since he was going to be late due to a rugby game, oops) = $15.

My friend came back to Western Washington which meant lots of visiting. 1 trip to Port Townsend (which also means 2 ferry rides - love); 3 trips to Monroe; 1 trip to Everett; and countless phone calls and texts.

Celebrated a 40th birthday for an amazing lady with some great friends!

3 Rugby games (undefeated and headed for state in May).

1 going away party for a friend headed to the Coast Guard.

30 days of Q&A a Day completed.
5 lists completed via Moorea Seal (well on my way to completed all 52!).

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Month in Numbers - March 2013

A little late but here nonetheless...

Spent 3 days in Seattle with Troy for our first visit to Emerald City Comic-con. We had 3 day passes and visited the convention at least once each day.

 While in Seattle visited the Seattle Public Library 3 times. Took Troy there for his 1st time.

 And met, for the very 1st time(!), my big brother (outside of the library at 1000 4th Avenue). Brother number 2 out of 3. I am very blessed in the brother department (and I don't want to leave out that I have 1 pretty amazing sister as well).

 Had my 1st pedicure of the year on all 10 of my toes! :)

 

Watched 8 amazing seniors (and many other wonderful boys) be honored for their time spent wrestling. Archer made 24 little Key Lime pies for the event. Proud mama moment.

Took 1 more trip to Seattle to visit with my brother again(!) and had 1 piece of the best pie ever (!) at High 5 Pie.

Worked for 6 days at Cheeks so Laura could go on vacation. Now have 2 new pair of jeans for myself, 1 for my sister, and several shirts as well...(and a reminder of what it is like to work in retail).

wearing 1 pair of Merrells from the shoe store that previously was in Cheeks' location!

2 family gatherings, 1 for Paula's 57th birthday in Lynden and 1 for Easter in Marysville.

...and finally, sent my 1 boy off for 10 days in Palau (6440 miles away) with his grandparents. (The photo has nothing to do with it, I just think it's hilarious! haha)

March was awesomely busy...loved the craziness of it all!

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